The Lawrence Frank of fantasy basketball used to run a team with a friend, but has since been relegated to keeping daily notes of every matchup and transaction. Who knows? Those notes may even be posted to a blog.
Whenever someone makes their draft pick, the David Stern of fantasy basketball will want to shake their hand. They might even want their picture taken too. It’s a good old classy, formal time. Well, sometimes:
The Brian Scalabrine of fantasy basketball may look like a scrub, but he dominates every league on planet earth.
Known for yelling after every single point, rebound, assist, field goal attempt, free throw, block, steal, and turnover, the Carlos Boozer of fantasy basketball just needs to chill out. Can also be applied to Joakim Noah.
With one game left in a weekly matchup and one turnover separating a win from a loss, the Andrea Bargnani of fantasy basketball will start every player imaginable because he has no presence of mind whatsoever. Can also be applied to J.R. Smith.
Similar to the Shawn Kemp of fantasy basketball, the Charles Barkley of league owners show up to the draft a tad overweight. Also, players who either lack a post game or live by the three-point shot will never be drafted.
Not to be confused with the Jason Kidd of fantasy basketball, the Billy King of league owners lives in the past by drafting players who were great five years ago. Everyone loves trading with this kind of league owner, one who would trade every single draft pick for the right to add Michael Jordan if he ever returned to the […]
The Tom Thibodeaus of fantasy basketball exhaust themselves every week, spending far too much time looking for that extra point or rebound and not enough time eating and sleeping. Take a breather.
If you’ve ever pretended you were sick or faked an injury just to make your opponent feel bad and let you win, you are the Vince Carter of fantasy basketball.